For: The Institute Of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Blue Online Worship Theology Course with Dan Wilt (ICEWS, eb 08)
If what I think is being communicated in week two of the Essentials Blue course is true, my theology has shifted. This should not be a surprise for me, as I have found this is not an uncommon experience when participating in a course through ICEWS of St. Stephen’s University!
In chapter 8 of Simply Christian(1), there is a section titled, "Jesus and Divinity."(2) In this section Wright asserts that Jesus was not aware of his “divinity,” mentioning his agony in the Garden of Gethsemane as an instance that would make this awareness “quite inexplicable.”(3) He goes on to say,
"I do not think that Jesus "knew he was divine" in the same way that we know we are cold or hot, happy or sad, male or female. It was more like the kind of "knowledge" we associate with vocation, where people know, in the very depths of their being, that they are called to be an artist, a mechanic, a philosopher. For Jesus, this seems to have been a deep "knowledge" of that kind, a powerful and all-consuming belief that Israel's God was more mysterious than most people had supposed; that within the very being of this God was a give-and-take, a to-and-fro, a love given and received. Jesus seems to have believed that he, the fully human prophet from Nazareth, was one of those partners in love. He was called, in obedience to the Father, to follow through the project to which that love would give itself freely and fully."(4)
As I read this, I was moved at the thought that Jesus truly understands the struggle I feel concerning what I “know in the very depths of my being that I am called to be”: a songwriter. He had a sense, a knowing of who he was, who he was created (in his humanity) to be, and he struggled to the point of sweating drops of blood (Luke 22:44). I have obviously not had this particular experience, but the thought that Jesus, having struggled himself, can meet me in my struggle to live out what I sense God has made me for, brings much comfort and hope. The promise given in Hebrews 4:14-16 comes to mind:
“Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let's not let it slip through our fingers. We don't have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He's been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let's walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.” The Message
I have read this scripture many times, always reassured that Jesus sympathizes with my weaknesses, because he’s lived them all. But, Wright’s assertion of Jesus’ struggle in Gethsemane, and taking into consideration his cry of, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46), caused the theology-shifting question to rise in me: Can it be that Jesus not only “gets” my struggle, he also struggled with saying yes to what he knew God had made him for? This being true crumbled walls I didn’t realize I had erected in my heart; walls that made it impossible for me to “take the mercy, accept the help.” It sounds too good to be true, and, as someone recently said to me, “That’s why they call it the good news!”
Wrestling with Wright’s paragraph above, brought up another question that I will process next time. Stay tuned!
(1)N.T. Wright, Simply Christianity: Why Christianity Makes Sense
San Francisco: HarperCollinsPublishers, 2006
(2) ibid p116
(3) ibid p118
(4) ibid p119
3 comments:
This NT Wright quote you’ve highlighted was one I’m left unpacking behind the scenes, so I was delighted to read your blog and see where you have travelled, fuelled by his words.
I appreciate your honest wrestling with those questions. (And...I look forward to your next post!)
The passage sent me searching through the gospels to see where Jesus moved in this “give-and-take, a to-and-fro, a love given and received”, displaying His divinity, and who He was called to be.
Was He 'aware' of it always? Was He stumbling into it, like we do sometimes? Was it unfolding in His life?
I got to His baptism, where He stepped into the waters out of obedience, the Spirit descended, and the Father’s voice confirmed “You are my Son, whom I love, with you I am well pleased.”
Read in the light of NT Wright’s words, it leaves me astounded at how Jesus lived on earth to “follow through the project to which that love would give itself freely and fully.”
Yet He was entering into the mystery, and as you say,the struggle of that also.
Your thoughts and reflections have been so helpful, thanks for blogging!
Awesome thoughts!
Cindy, I'm so delighted with your question, and your attempt at an answer, I'm going to let it simmer.
To "know" ourselves is somehow different than knowing the details of our identity, nature, and soul makeup.
Hmmm. d.
Post a Comment